Mumble of thoughts

Hi y’all

It has been a while since I posted anything. I tried. I tried writing a lot of times. Sometimes I could write only the title and some times just a line or two. I haven’t been able to put my thoughts into words for quite some time now. Not that the kind of writing I do is too difficult to think of or process but sometimes you just can’t. Sometimes you can’t emote. Some times you think what’s the point. Sometimes you just have this void surrounding you that beats you to not do anything ever.

My stay in Delhi is coming to an end. I never thought I would say this but I am going to miss this place. The weird people and the beautiful campus I live in. A year ago, around this time I was still confused about what I would be doing next. Most of all, If I do what I want to do, why do I want to do it? I have always had that issue with my goals and dreams. Why are they my goals and dreams? What would they help me feel? How would they help the people I care about feel? Now, nothing has changed but somehow everything has. I am once again moving to another new city in India, closer to home for work.

Doing work for money is scary. I mean, most of my life I have been paying (My dad has) people to make me learn. Now I am going to get paid for doing something which will help another person, as well as help me learn. Involving this other person, scares me. Actually failure scares me. It is not that I haven’t failed but I haven’t failed another person along with me. I may have failed my dad’s or mom’s expectations sometimes but they are family. Family accepts your failures, is understanding and encourages you to move on to the next thing you want to succeed in or asks you to try again. At work, this wouldn’t happen and that scares me a tiny bit.

Any way, I had to do my research project for the final semester. I did it on internal branding and completed it just yesterday when my laptop crashed. The funny thing is, I had just mailed my dad and my best friend a copy of my research for them to review it and that literally saved my sanity despite the circumstances. I am grateful to whatever it was that made me mail them..fate.karma.god.whatever.
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Apart from all that, I watched a movie today on the reset laptop called Little Prince. It was beautiful. I suggest all of y’all watch it. It’s about a girl, a grandpa, a prince and a rose. Very well scripted and wonderfully executed. I just loved it. If any of you has already watched it, let me know how you liked it in the comments below.

Cheers,

Kavya.

(Yaay! I completed a post after a long time.)

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